"Too many people miss the silver lining because they're expecting gold" -Unknown

SILVER YEAR
(a quarter life journey --- hoping that I live to a hundred)

Today I turned twenty five. Some people would like to think that this is the golden age because this is where it should all come together--- plans, dreams, long term goals. I celebrated my birthday intimately with my family. I'm not really big with parties. You can ask Kaloggals (my high school barkada) when was the last time I celebrated my birthday and I think their answer would be my 18th birthday (yeah, yeah I had my debut and all--- but no cotillion for me, just the fluffy baby blue gown).

Before I turned twenty five, I had this vision of myself that when this age comes, I would be more content with my achievements, fulfilled with my mission, and happier in the aspects of family, career, and love. That was what I envisioned myself would be when I graduated in high school. This was going to be the turning point of my life. But those visions were made 8 years ago when I thought that college life was long enough to plan your future, working a minimum of 3 years would increase your market value all the way up the corporate ladder, and being in a relationship for more than 5 years merits you the decision to get married. You could say that I am quite an optimist because I dream big. But what I have realized through my journey to my silver year was that life catches you at your most unguarded moments. It pinches your heart with too much sadness and just like a blink of an eye, can easily make you tumble and turn for joy. You see, what I have been envisioning myself to be has been based on something that's too tangible. What never hit me was to be really happy, it must reach a part of you that no one can see but is manifested on your personality--- the heart. Happiness, afterall cannot be measured by the number of times you laughed, how long you smile everyday, or even how many commas and zeros are there on your bank account. To sleep peacefully at night, to eat good food, to be healthy, to have a family--- these should be the basis to happiness. I am like the many who took for granted what I have before me until they start to become scarce. But now I know better...

For five years now, I have been celebrating my birthday in the company of "strangers". To me it is more special, more heartfelt. And this year was no different.

I went to CRIBS Marikina today. CRIBS is a shelter for abandoned babies. I have been doing outreach projects on or before my birthday. I feel that this is my way of thanking God for the numerous blessings that my family receives. I will not brag that I am the most benevolent person in the world because I have my flaws too.

Today's trip is extra special because I shared it with my family, Jelson, and Jelson's family. It was sheer joy seeing my family care for the babies. You see, there are 17 babies and there but only very few volunteers. We all had our own "alagas" when we stayed there. Mama took extra care for Nicole, a baby diagnosed with cerebral palsy. I wanted to adopt all of them if only I have enough means to accomodate them all.

It's so sad that it has to take over a dozen babies with no parents to call their own to make us realize how blessed we are. Still, it was a humbling experience that leaves you warm inside (from all the crying that you will do).

The silver year celebration that I imagined to be exceeded my expectations. And now, more that I thought was possible, I can say that I was able to achieve something that no one can take away from me. Ü

==================================================== A bunch of THANK YOUS

*To Mama, Jay-ar, Kuya Jon, Ate Fiona, Danielle, Diego, Kuya Al, Ate Jeng, Kuya Gary, Tita Susie, Jeng, and Jelson for accompanying me at CRIBS.

*To Danie, Diego, and Dima for the drawings that can best out the greatest artist (those are my babies and that's my opinion anyway)

*To Papa for taking time to call me on that day.

*To everyone who greeted me through text
-Tita Julie, Geka, Melai, Annche and Earl, Carlo, Ms Lot, Ms Amy, Tsong Jack, Ate Fiona, Tita Beng Tito Nelson Ga and Ging, Monica, Tita Susie, Ate Mia, Jelson, Tsong Ely, Don Yu, Cecile, Tita Inday Tito Ta Micko Mike and Maco, Mama Connie, Ms Ingrid, Noel B., Mia, Ms Danette, Uncle Jun, Ate Ching, Atoy, Ypan, Bok, Mateth, Aileen, Kuya Jayjay, Auntie Julie, Erin, Best Sig, Tita Neth Tito Onie and Mags, Kuya Dong, Micko, Itchel, Razel, Redg, Jogs, Eidel, Ting, Jonille, Uncle Bot Tita Belen PY Pao and Janus, Jez, Johnny and Aileen, Love, Cielo

*To those who sent their message thru friendster
-Ayin, Iole, Drix, Tristan

*To Tita Inday and Tito Ta for bringing food last July 4 Ü

*To Ms Ingrid, Don Yu, Melai, Ms Danette, and Minna for the surprise cake at coop last July 4 Ü

*To Jelson for making me feel that I am worthy to be loved.